Ordained As Church Elder

Last May 17, 2023, I attended our Church’s MidWeek Service. It is being held every Wednesday and I have challenged myself to attend and participate. It was our Prayer Meeting but was more like a Bible Study where we study and not really pray like in Prayer Meetings.

So before we left that night, I was asked if I would like to be part of the CBCC Elders. I said ‘yes’. I prayed to God within that week regarding this matter. I know it was a tough job because being an Elder is not as easy as it seems.

Being ordained as a church elder is a great honor and responsibility. It is a calling from God to serve His people in a leadership role. Elders are responsible for overseeing the spiritual life of the church, providing guidance and support to the Pastor, and helping to make decisions that are in the best interests of the congregation.

I was ordained here at CBCC Banay Banay and the Pastor who ordained me was the head Pastor of CBCC Pulo which is the mother church. As of the moment, CBCC Banay-Banay does not have a Pastor yet so the Elders are the one who “runs” the church. The Pastors we are associated with are in CBCC Pulo which is the motherchurch.

Elders bear authority over Jesus’s church only to the extent that they teach, obey, and enforce Jesus’s word.” Elders lead by standing before their congregation on behalf of the Lord Jesus Christ and proclaiming his rule, his truth, and his commands. (Bedzyk, 2019).

Being an elder is a privilege and a joy. It is an opportunity to make a difference in the lives of others and to help build up the body of Christ. If one is called by God to serve as an Elder, it is important to remember that you are not alone. You will be surrounded by a team of other Elders who are committed to serving God together.

I know this will never be easy and I just pray that God will use me and let me be the man He wants me to be.

Nararapat Sa’Yo

Ako’y lumalapit sa kabanalan Mo
Ang puso ko’y inaalay Sa’Yo
Nagpapakumbaba Sa’Yo Panginoon
Ang buhay kong ito’y gamitin Mo

Sa isang pagsambang
Nararapat Sa’Yo o Diyos
Tanggapin aking hain na pagpupuri
Sa’Yo lamang Hesus

Nararapat Sa'Yo
Passion Generation Worship Band
©2021

Nowhere Found

I have looked and have found none,
Needed to rest, to cool down.
Blacked out and have passed out.
Never wanting to resurface and breathe.

How have I forgotten this?
How did I never learn from the past?
My mistakes were all a byproduct.

Never saw the whole picture.
Never intended to look back,
Unwilling to forgive and forget,
Tortured soul.

Admitted to none of all my crimes.
Murdered the wholesomeness,
Created a monster.

I was there from the start,
I was there when it all happened,
I was there where the action was.
Yet I failed. Yes, I am a failure.

August 27, 2022
Gabs Narazo
©2022 [BLuRReD projekt]

Rainy Day Thoughts

It has been raining since yesterday and all I was thinking about was going to Taysan this Sunday. Not that I am excited about it but the truth is, I don’t want to go.

I have already bid my goodbyes to them last month because of reasons. All I want for now is to take care of my family’s needs. I have to find a job and I have to provide for my kids. But at the same time, I would like to minister to them.

Why am I sharing this tidbit? Because I got tired of traveling to and from Taysan on those broken roads. Literally broken roads! Then I got apprehended and my license was confiscated and I am still unable to take care of it because it happened in Sto. Tomas, Batangas.

I should have written an entry last April when it happened but no, I did not. I should have written about the time when I was already losing my grip and my sanity but I did not.

Am I sounding like talking to myself?! Well, bear with me because this rain really does make me sane. I just hope and pray that God will allow me to work WHILE ministering to others.

That’s all. For now.

Untitled Entry.

Sometimes I just want to write some things about what’s happening to me and what I think about things. But most often than not, I tend to shy away because I know people read and they know if they’re the topic or what. I don’t want to burn bridges now and I don’t like confrontation that will involve my family. I have already caused enough pain to them and to others.

I know I have made a lot of stupid, crazy things before and right now, I can no longer do that. I would like to say that I have grown and have somehow, matured. But who knows? It’s just me saying it. I still am stuck with writing blogs, and I am too lazy to do vlogs. I can’t finish my stories because they’re too complex for me.

There are times that I just want to be alone and be left alone, but that may never happen because I have three kids and two nephews, my mother and my wife. Plus, three dogs, and four pups. I would love to ride a motorcycle again while listening to music. Because through that, I am free. Sort of.

Why am I writing now? I am not sure. I know that my loneliness is still there. That deep seated sadness and aloneness. I know it’s still there. God I really hope He knows why He picked me. Right now I am very confused and very disoriented and troubled.

There are times that suicide still knocks, and although I think I know better now than before to wish for death to come, there are still moments that I really want to do it. I know it is wrong because I will just be passing the pain on to someone else, and I know it is a sin against God. I do pray for help because at times, I feel that I am letting go.

Is this becoming a diary?! Hope not. But this is the first time in a long time that I have written something here, and I really hope that it makes sense to anyone who will read this. Then there’s also that part that I just lost my job.

Unrequited Love

I sat here alone,
I was crying all night long,
Tears haven’t stopped yet,
Never made it set.
Still here, sitting on my own.

I tried to write,
to make things right,
But all I got is this emptiness.
I am surrounded by nothingness.

Here I am shoved to the floor,
Trying to crawl back,
Ran to the door.

Why have I trusted you
When this is what you can give back?

I was a fool to believe.
I was stupid.
I am so crazy.

May 7, 2022
Gabs Narazo
©2022 [BLuRReD projekt]

Ruins

The layout of the foundations have been dug,
The first set of bricks have been laid in place,
The first cement has been put into place,
The windows and door has been installed.
The countdown begins.

Smiles were born so as tears.
Children were laughing and some were crying.
Arguments and reconciliations were made,
Inside this tiny place of home.

Soon, they start leaving the place,
One by one they transferred to another place,
They started a new life and now lives separately,
The original family tree is now downsizing.
How time flies.

Now death has come to collect what’s due.
Tears have flowed and hearts were broken.
One without one is now just loneliness.

Then death came anew and took the last one.
He smiled.
Thinking of the memories he had left behind.

A few years more, and all were just decay.
Nothing was left standing.
Nothing. Except weeds and trees.
The cycle begins.

May 30, 2022
Gabs Narazo
©2022 [BLuRReD projekt]

Natagpuan

Ang tinig Mo ay aking hanap-hanap
Sa gitna ng bawat takot at paghihirap
Sa kabila ng aking pagkukulang
Katapatan Mo O Diyos tanging laan

Sa puso at damdamin, Ika’y mananatili
Walang hanggan ang alay Mong pag-ibig

Natagpuan ng Iyong pag-ibig na dakila
Doon sa krus, ako’y Iyong pinalaya
Hesus, ako’y aaawit ng
Walang hanggang pagpupuri
Ang puso ko’y Sa’Yo iaalay

Panginoon, Ikaw ang kaagapay
Kabutihan Mo saki’y di nagkukulang
Panginoon, Ikaw lang ang kailangan
Magpakailanman Sa’Yo ako’y mananahan

Sa puso at damdamin, Ika’y mananatili
Walang hanggan ang alay Mong pag-ibig

Natagpuan ng Iyong pag-ibig na dakila
Doon sa krus, ako’y Iyong pinalaya
Hesus, ako’y aaawit ng
Walang hanggang pagpupuri
Ang puso ko’y Sa’Yo iaalay

Hangad ko lang ay mamalagi sa presensya Mo
Natagpuan, ako’y binago ng pag-ibig Mo
Hangad ko lang ay mamalagi sa presensya Mo
Luwalhatiin ang pangalan Mo

Bagong Yugto
Hope Filipino Worship
©2021

On Hanging By A Thread.

I am hanging by a thread. I am lost for words and I don’t know what to do. All I can think of right now is to pray. Allow God to move and do His thing. Been looking for work since February to no avail. All I got was two companies who offers commission basis work which is good but not right now for me.

There’s a lot of promises made by God and right now, all I can think of was what David said in Psalm 37:25 [NKJV]

“I have been young, and now am old;
Yet I have not seen the righteous forsaken,
Nor his descendants begging bread.”

Remembering what these past few years have taught me and what opened my eyes, Matthew 6:33 [NKJV] that says:

“But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, AND all these things shall be added to you.”

All the things that I need will be given once I obey. That is my key. OBEDIENCE.

I just hope that God will not let me slide and lose grip on this thread that I am holding onto.

Ballads of The Fallen Angel [G 7th suspended 2nd – G7sus2]

why are you so downfall?
why let tears fall down?
have you let it happen?
or did you let goodness fly?

tears, soulful song, blood…
anger has calmed down,
now guilt and self-pity
is what filling your heart.

after the saga has ended,
when time has been stopped,
the song of the fallen angel,
disguised as a demon ceased.

now rest your soul in peace,
let the sun rise to them.
don’t let them hear again,
the ballads of the fallen angel.

September 12, 2004
Gabs Narazo
©2004 [BLuRReD projekt]